Three Big Choices That Changed My Life - What Are Yours?

How I learnt to design a life around my values instead of other people's expectations

What if I told you that the secret to feeling truly alive isn't about working harder, earning more, or following someone else's blueprint for success?

Picture this: I'm sitting in the back of my converted van, doors flung wide to a river landscape, midges buzzing around me (definitely not glamorous!), and I'm thinking about how three "unconventional" choices completely changed my relationship with life itself. Not in an Instagram-perfect way, but in a deeply authentic, this-is-what-alignment-actually-feels-like way.

You know that feeling when you're successful on paper but something still feels... off? When you've done the therapy, read the books, had the breakthroughs, but you're still getting pulled off course by shoulds and expectations? I've been there. And what I discovered is that sometimes the most radical thing you can do is simply ask yourself: What do I actually need to feel alive?

In this post, I'm sharing the three conscious choices that shifted everything for me—not because you should copy them exactly, but because they might spark something in you about what your own version of authentic living could look like.

Choice One: Creating Your Own Version of Freedom

The truth is, freedom doesn't have to look like anyone else's definition.

For me, freedom meant buying a basic van and converting it myself, nothing fancy, just a bed, some storage, a gas cooker, and yes, a wee pot (my kids are mortified). But this simple setup has given me something priceless: the ability to be spontaneous, to have adventures on a budget, and to maintain my sanity during challenging times.

Over the years when I have faced challenges I have been able to grab some provisions, head outside to my van and head off. My van became my sanctuary. I could go anywhere, experience nature, still feel free even when my body was limiting me in other ways or be cosy and comfortable wherever I was.

Your version might look completely different. Maybe it's a smaller home in a place you love rather than a bigger one you can't afford. Maybe it's choosing experiences over expensive things, or saying no to social obligations that drain you.

Try this: Ask yourself what freedom actually means to you, not what it should mean, but what it genuinely feels like in your body. Start there.

Choice Two: Investing in Yourself as Sacred Practice

What if personal growth wasn't a luxury but essential infrastructure for a life well-lived?

Since before my son was born (and he's 14 now), I've continuously had at least one coach, course, mentor, therapist, or teacher. People sometimes think this is indulgent, but I see it as one of the most radical acts of self-love I can practice.

This isn't about trying to fix yourself because you're broken, it's about recognising that we're not meant to figure everything out alone. Every guide I've worked with has helped me peel back another layer, understand myself more deeply, and show up more authentically in the world.

The ripple effect has been incredible. When I'm growing, I'm a better parent, a better coach, a better friend. When I'm investing in my own healing and development, I have so much more to give.

Here's the thing: This doesn't have to mean expensive courses or coaches. It could be reading books that challenge you, seeking out mentors, or joining communities of people growing in directions you want to grow.

Try this: Identify one area where you'd benefit from guidance. Then take one small step, whether that's buying a book, reaching out to someone you admire, or researching local workshops. You could also sign up for my FREE MASTERCLASS for some new inspiration and a deepening of what you already know.

Choice Three: Designing Work Around Life (Not the Other Way Around)

The most audacious thing I ever did? Ask for what I actually needed.

At my very first job interview out of university, one I really wanted, I did something that felt terrifying. Before I even knew if I had the job, I said: "This would really work for me if I could do it over 3.5 days rather than 5."

I got the job.

Since then, apart from short busts of intensity, I've never worked full-time. As a self-employed single parent, this has sometimes meant being financially stretched, and that brings its own challenges. But it's also meant I could be there for school plays and sick days, take time off to travel with my kids, and say yes to opportunities that excited me even if they didn't pay much.

The key was getting clear on what mattered most to me: flexibility, presence with my children, and the ability to design work around my energy rather than forcing my life around arbitrary schedules.

Your version might be working four days instead of five, taking a month off each year, or structuring your work around your natural rhythms. The point isn't the specific choice, it's having the courage to ask for what you need.

Try this: Identify one aspect of your work life that doesn't align with your values or needs. My FREE Guided Video Life Compass Assessment can help you do this. Then brainstorm one small way you could shift it, even slightly, toward better alignment.

The Real Secret: It's Not About the Choices—It's About the Courage

Here's what I've learnt: these three choices weren't really about the van, the learning, or the work schedule. They were about developing the courage to listen to my own inner voice and then act on what I heard.

Living consciously isn't about creating a perfect life, it's about creating an authentic one. It's about recognising that you have more choice than you think, even within constraints. It's about designing a life that reflects your values rather than trying to fit yourself into someone else's blueprint.

When you start making choices from alignment rather than expectation, something magical happens: you give other people permission to do the same. Your authentic choices ripple out in ways you can't even imagine.

Your Turn: What's Your Version of Conscious Living?

The version of yourself you're becoming is waiting for a braver decision. You already have everything you need, you just need the right framework to access it.

Ready to dive deeper? Listen to the full podcast episode where I share more personal stories and insights about conscious living:

Want practical tools to get started? If this resonates and you're thinking "Yes, but how do I actually make these kinds of conscious choices in my own life?"I have something perfect for you.

First, discover where you are right now: Take my FREE Life Compass Assessment to evaluate yourself across 8 essential life areas and discover exactly where you're thriving versus where you might be living reactively. It's a powerful tool for getting honest about your current alignment.

Then join me live: I'm hosting a free masterclass called "Designing a Life Aligned to Your True North" on Wednesday, 6th August at 10:30am. In this session, I'll share the exact framework I use with visionary women to navigate from wholeness, not hustle. You'll learn the Compass Check-In Practice, a 2-minute tool to make aligned decisions from your whole self, not just your mind.

This masterclass is for you if you've done the therapy, the coaching, the courses, but you're craving something deeper. If you want your outer world to finally reflect your inner growth.

SAVE YOUR SPOT HERE - AUGUST 6TH

Remember: your inner voice is calling for a reason. The earth needs people like you who are willing to develop their own internal compass in service of something larger.